http://rageofaquarius.com Thu, 18 Feb 2010 00:41:39 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en It took me over an hour to realize that the smell was coming from my car. The first time I caught a whiff of what I assumed was the runoff from a slaughterhouse, I was parked outside Community Health. Naturally, I assumed the rotting-flesh-scent was emanating from the clinic's parking lot. (Only insured people get to park ... http://rageofaquarius.com/2010/02/the-mysterious-case-of-the-dead-animal-in-the-manifold/ It took me over half an hour this afternoon to realize that the nasty stench I couldn't get away from was coming from my own clothing. I didn't recognize it right away, because I'd only smelled it once before: in my office coat closet. It was the same disgusting b.o. ... http://rageofaquarius.com/2010/01/cubicle-pollution/ It's finally happening. I've got irrefutable proof that I'm getting old and boring. Yesterday I was reaching for the Red Delicious I'd brought to work and spied a tasty Braeburn in the fridge fruit drawer. Three things went through my head in rapid succession: 1. I wish I had that Braeburn instead of ... http://rageofaquarius.com/2010/01/apple-envy/ File this under the who-asked-for-it category: Lilith Fair is back. You read that right. Eleven years after Sarah McLachlan folded her tent, she's reopening it with another femme lesbian circus playing for peanuts. Yes, of course the Indigo Girls will be performing. I am secure enough in my ovaries to skip the ... http://rageofaquarius.com/2009/12/the-broads-are-back-in-town/ Hot on the heels of holiday overindulgence--the new secret to slimming down quickly:  I always knew that I was wasting my time actually exercising. Finally, a diet for couch potatoes! Plus, all the healthy tanning you can stand for a mere $45/month. Note that they don't promise you'll "lose" inches. You'll "luze" ... http://rageofaquarius.com/2009/12/thanks-but-ill-stick-to-the-gym/ First, I have to blow my own horn. Before I moved out to Wyoming, the very thought of snakes terrified me. My only experience with them was at the "World of Darkness" exhibit at the Bronx Zoo. Then I came west for a one-month writer's residency program. I immediately resolved not ... http://rageofaquarius.com/2009/12/oh-theres-a-snake-in-the-house/ I'm all for the idea of governmental non-interference, but I seriously think that my student loan lendor (in this case the Federal Government) should've been legally required to advise me, as an English major, that I would have a greater chance in the future of being struck by lightning than I ... http://rageofaquarius.com/2009/12/christian-cowboy-bling/ I think I may have to go to Tea-hab. My effort to eliminate coffee was a smashing success, but now I'm hooked on tea. Not even caffeinated tea. Licorice, of all things, is my new herb of choice. In the general scheme of addictions, it's a "good" one. But it still has its ... http://rageofaquarius.com/2009/12/licorice-tea-hab/ No question about it: I am an avowed fan of Richard Kelly's Donnie Darko. I could probably watch it monthly and still find new stuff in it to cherish. I appreciated Southland Tales in all its deep, dark messiness. But The Box? I found it too dumbed down to love. At first, ... http://rageofaquarius.com/2009/11/the-box-more-darko-than-donnie/ My ambitious plan to stay out past midnight on Halloween was dashed almost as soon as it was hatched. I swore that I could do it more than once a calendar year--I'd have two whole months to recover for New Year's Eve--but my brain shut down at 9 after a ... http://rageofaquarius.com/2009/11/spooky-square-dance/