As it turns out, one day is more than enough time to spend behind the wheel of a Chevy Aveo.

Granted, I’m not gung-ho on rental cars to begin with. It takes me too many highway-swerving minutes to tune the radio, adjust the mirrors, and to decide whether the beams shooting out of the front of  my car are headlights or running lights (the jury’s still out on that one, but at least I didn’t drain the battery, on any account). Trying to fill up the gas tank without prior investigation is always good for a hoot. Granted, once I find the tank, it’s always superduper fun to locate the lever that actually opens it.

Driving this cheap piece of tin to work today, I couldn’t find the @!# cupholder. Apparently it was a design dream to have the holders  recede into the dashboard–indicated with a little logo that looks like nothing so much as a tornado. Of course! Here’s where I store my swirly beverages!

And then there’s the steering wheel.

I still haven’t deciphered the buttons to the left of the wheel, and now I never will. “Power” seemed far too presumptive…I mean, who wants all that responsibility? To the right, I discovered cruise control. I admit that I refused to touch those buttons for several long, speedy miles. The button in the middle had a clock logo, so I was absolutely certain that once I touched it the countdown would begin. I could just picture myself blowing the cherry red hood off  going 75 mph down I-90.

(I blame Transporter 3 for this sort of mad fantasy.)

 The worst design feature, though, has to go to the sun visor. I yanked it down in desperation this morning when the sun–imagine that–came blaring through the windshield at a wattage equal only to night games at Yankee Stadium. And what to my wondering eyes should appear–but a tiny, super-reflective mirror.

??????????????????????

Does Chevy assume that Aveo drivers are so vain that they need instant access to their visages? Apparently, accurate lipstick-application comes before driver safety. I mean, I had sun coming at me from all angles. The last thing I needed was another way to bounce those beams off my skull. But that’s exactly what I got.

I turned the car back in today without the least bit of remorse.

The gas tank, for the record, is on the passenger’s side.